Mums Takeover: Leanne " I'm basically like a shit car with a fancy Sunroof"

Next up we have Leanne who talks about her birthing experiences. Leanne is the lovely lady who came up with Social Sweat (a child friendly workout) through her networking buisness @thesocialclubsaltburn. She has two beautiful little girls, Piccolo & Coco (Hopefully coco will be Wilders wife one day),  She always has time for ANYONE (no matter how busy she is), and she has helped me grow so much personally and in buisness. Whats even more awesome Is that she has brought so many mums together in our lovely little home town.

Thanks Leanne...

I have been pregnant three times, and each of those babies have come out not in the way mother nature, advertising or the social norm had intended.

Choosing the slice, dice, stretch and sew method, Piccolo Sophia and Coco Luna were born via caesarean section and what is now a 10 cm scar that runs just above my lets be honest ‘bush’.

Baby number 2, came out through my belly button just like in the stories you would hear when you were little. At 9ish weeks, this little Benoliel chose to house themselves in my fallopian tube and when it all got a bit cramped and went pop out they came, literally through my belly button!

I don’t suppose I’d ever really thought about the stigma attached to caesareans until I was pregnant with Coco. Piccolo’s birth was shattering to me physically and mentally and an ectopic nearly ever so nearly pushed me over several edges. And being one fallopian tube down, with my little miracle baby I’d therefore made the assumption that a baby delivered healthily was the norm and everyone that I would meet would respect, maybe that’s the wrong word as I’d not really thought twice about it, but maybe agree that my decision to avoid the same trauma, was the right one, as I’d opted for an elective section.

During my pregnancy with Coco I’d had a few conversations with people mainly family, and the general perception seemed to be that having a caesarean section to bring a child into the world is "taking the easy way out" (I would wince, scrunch up my face and try not to explode in their ignorance).

One family member even stated “eee she’s like one of these celebrities, too posh to push” … I know, I might have been in for some inheritance or a long stretch if I had carried out every intended action.

For me personally first-time round it was one of, if not the hardest things emotionally and physically I have ever been through. Each birth is different and by no means am I trying to take away anything from a vaginal birth - I've never done it so cannot compare, but please don't judge me or others with the little information you do know.

27 December 2011 at 39w 1d 10:30pm I was induced after my 'hind' waters had broken at a football match (I thought I’d wet myself as I had to walk up quite a few stairs). I quickly started to contract and within the hour these were very strong and only a few minutes apart. However, after eight hours, I'd still only dilated 2cm. I had previously joked that my birth would be hard because my vagina was like an olive … turns out the only thing like an olive was my cervix, one of those crappy black ones that you leave until last at Nandos, because lets face it no one really likes them. And I’m pretty sure at one point a midwife had a bright orange B&Q flash light up my V, I kid you not, so not quite sure I can still make that claim!

After several failed epidurals, Piccolo had become 'distressed' and had a questionable heartbeat. The decision was made, I would have an emergency caesarean.

Just like that I was wheeled into the operating theatre with what seemed to be like a lot of doctors and nurses surrounding me. I was upset ... this wasn't quite how ‘it was meant to be’ and to say I had a lose birthing plan is an understatement. Concerned about the urgency of everything, what the hell was going on that it had to be so speedy. Worried about what I did know, 'heartbeat' 'distressed and a whole barrage of doctoring terms I had no idea about ... oh and in a hell of a lot of pain, because yes I was still contracting!

The anaesthetist made four attempts to insert a spinal block - a 9cm needle into the space between my vertebrate. This involved me being completely naked (don't worry, my dignity had exited the hospital at 10:45, a whole 15 minutes after stepping foot in the place) putting my head between my knees, over a 9-month, three stone bump and staying perfectly still whilst each attempt failed.

Ben scrubbed up, came in and then was asked to leave. He kissed me and then I was on my own. For me loneliness is scary. Anyone that knows me, will know that being on my own is a massive I guess, fear. I don’t do well on my own, unless I’m asleep and with that I was …

I was anaesthetised, out cold.

Which meant when my daughter was being resuscitated for 15 minutes, I wasn't there.

I wasn't the first person to hold her.

I wasn't the first person to see her.

I wasn't there to share the moment with Ben.

Because we never had that moment and that's the bit that still hurts. But now, when I can I get those 15 minutes in and hold her so tightly!

I woke up in recovery, thankfully surrounded by family and a beautiful if slightly hairy baby girl, feeding.

This was short lived as I had to be stripped and bed bathed by two nurses with the help of my sister (sorry Laura) (dignity ... exit, that way>>>>>).

Second time round, I got my moment! That Lion King effect, only my Rafiki was a surgeon holding up a puffy little chunk over a screen as she wee’d and poo’d all over my pride land!

It was such a different vibe and one that I can’t be more thankful for. It closed a lot of emotional chapters, the smoothness and the feeling that yes, I might not have ‘given birth’ but I have birthed two utterly amazing children (as I sit typing this, thankful for the peace and quiet as they are on the beach with Ben).

What stresses I did have about my compressed spine were reassured when the anaesthetists told me he had all day and there wasn’t a rush (hurt like a bitch going through six failed spinals though).

And within 2 hours 16 minutes of arriving we had another baby!

I wasn’t too posh to push, it was my way of ensuring I gave birth in a safe and what’s my ‘natural’ way.

It usually takes about six weeks to recover from a caesarean section. I spent two days in hospital with both babies, desperately trying to take care of my baby, with limited movement and having to ask for assistance to carry out the most basic of tasks.

A midwife told me afterwards that it’s a similar operation to having a hysterectomy (I’m not a doctor so I cant compare) but women who go through this have a three month sickness note. You have in some cases seconds before you’re handed over your new job assignment!

For the first week, walking upstairs is almost impossible and don’t even talk to me about trying to have a poo!! F**K just F**K!

Week two, walking 200 yards to the shop takes 45 minutes and forget pushing the pushchair, you've swooned over for at least six months.

Week three - six recovery on your own with a new baby, I imagine this phase for most mums is quite difficult emotionally. Thanks for the instructions mother nature!!

I never had abs so week six - month nine ... no biggy, that flabby bit of skin aint going anywhere (well until I put down the gin and chocolate biscuits)

I think generally I now have quite a bit of scar tissue from two caesareans and one salpingectomy so most of my tummy is numb but in a sensitive very hard to describe way and ovulating is an absolute bitch that hurts like crazy.

Your also left with a (questionable) 'bikini line' scar, which I used to think 'just a little reminder that I couldn't do it properly' ... but actually it's my reminder that I did it!

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